Wisdom is the principle thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding. (proverbs 4v7)
So I’ve been doing my research into the tangible ways men and women show love. After reading the book The 5 love languages by Gary Chapman I realised that perhaps males and females are misunderstood when it comes to loving their partner, because ultimately we love people the way we expect to be loved. If we took the time to understand one another, I believe this would yield many successful relationships. The five love languages are:
Quality time – physically being in someones presence, as well as communication via phone, text, Skype, etc
Receiving gifts – self explanatory! Who doesn’t like this?
Acts of service – helping out with household chores or everyday things that need doing, like paying bills, putting petrol in the car, cooking etc
Words of affirmation – encouraging words that reinforce your inner value not just complimenting your appearance, although it is good to hear
Physical touch – cuddles anyone?
When I did the survey which can be found here http://www.5lovelanguages.com. I found out that my love language is quality time. You don’t even really need to do the survey, all you need to do is ask yourself, which of the five hurts the most when you don’t receive it? I really enjoy spending time with the people I love, so quality time is a biggie for me and those who know me will see a very different person when that is not fulfilled…by the people I care about (lol). It’s not to say that the others are not important, that’s just the most important one for me! In fact I’ll put them in order of importance quality time, physical touch, giving gifts, acts of service and words of affirmation. I’ve actually come to learn over the years how important acts of service is, and it really should be second or maybe even first on the list. Simple things that men do like filling up the petrol in your car, taking out the rubbish, cooking, and washing up I have overlooked in previous relationships, when really it’s these simple things that are needed in a successful family unit. When you’ve lived with somebody for years it’s these mundane things that need to happen on a daily basis and it’s a blessing to have someone who will share in these responsibilities from time to time. The order of importance may evolve over time, as we grow and live life a little more. However at this age and stage quality time is my number one.
Whats your love language? Please share yours in the comment box below. In the meantime between time I’ll leave you with this poem.