Though he slay me, yet I will trust him. (Job 13v15)
There are times when trials and afflictions have you so far down in the dumps that even on a sunny day you just want to close the curtains and go back to bed. So many people close to me have been through hardship and pain particularly this year. Whether its the loss of a loved one, financial struggles, health problems or family problems, yet we have to find the strength to push through and fight another day.
The number of people I know who have been struggling with depression for a long time is quite alarming. Yet I champion their strength to keep going through life, with the hope that there will be a better day ahead. I just wanna say I know exactly how you feel. Although I wouldn’t diagnose myself as depressed, I can definitely say that my mind is a battlefield. For the majority of my life I’ve always been so upbeat, you can call me an eternal optimist. Even now I feel like I’m living in the best of times and the worst of times at the same time and because of it my emotions are in a constant state of fluctuation. Some areas of my life are great but others are at ground zero. I’ve been waiting so long for God to answer this one prayer and each time I think finally this is it…he has answered my prayer, something goes wrong and I’m back to square one. I have no doubt he will answer its just…how long?
I once heard someone say the mind is like the sky and your thoughts are like the clouds, sometimes you get a grey blanket (negative thoughts) covering the sky and sometimes you have small passing clouds. The key thing to remember is that the clouds always pass to reveal another beautiful sun shining day and even when the sky is grey, know that there is light behind negative thoughts.
King David said “Be of good courage” while you wait. There’s always a purpose to the pain and a plan for every failure. If I didn’t fail at my driving test, I probably wouldn’t be the cautious driver that I am now. If I didn’t have such a hard time while I was training to be a teacher, I probably wouldn’t be as diligent as I am now. The bottom line is you can always see the purpose of the trial in hindsight. While you’re going through something it’s natural to ask “Why” but always remember it takes pressure to produce precious jewels, it takes time to yield fruit and it takes fire to get rid of impurity.
I don’t know why I decided to write this but I will leave you with this. A bamboo tree takes about three years to grow…underground!!! (Imagine watering this seed for three years before you actually see anything, people would think you’re crazy), but once its out of the ground it grows really fast in a few months to at least 8ft tall. Maybe you are that bamboo tree and your tears are the water used to help the seed to grow, and once you reach full season you will spring up out of no where for all to see.