Seems like honesty is the new game for cheaters. For a long time the titles liar and cheater have walked hand in hand, but how do you deal with an honest cheater? Men are shifting the way they approach cheating, they know women love honesty and hate lies, so now they let you know the deal (regarding their relationship status) and see if you take the bait. That way, if you get yourself into a situationship its your own fault. What is a situationship? Aiden Neals definition is as follows;
A situationship is basically a pseudo-relationship. A placebo masking itself as a formative relationship. It smells like a relationship, it sorta looks like a relationship, and it may even feel like one, but it’s not.
An example of a situationship would be a female who took the bait (explained above), either convincing herself that he’s gonna leave the other woman or she believes SHE has the power in the situation (a no strings attached attitude). Unfortunately for her the man has no intention of leaving his woman, you know this because he was honest from the beginning, you walked into the situation eyes wide open. So when you are calling him on a daily basis and he doesn’t answer, he’s not expecting you to go nuts because you should know what time it is. When he can’t take you out on a date because he could be spotted, don’t get mad because you know what time it is. However don’t get it twisted this type of guy will take you on a date…off endz! Is that how you want to be living your life? As a secret.
This type of situationship is a gamble on the mans part, because there are some psycho women out there who will not only do the man harm but everybody that is close to him…anyone seen Fatal Attraction? The female ego that believes “I am tha Bomb.com, and surely he’s gonna leave his woman when he realises how great I am”, is dangerous. That ideology is birthed in insecurity. If you are “tha bomb.com” you wouldn’t need to steal anybody else’s man. In fact you would have a plethora of men beating down your door. My point is situationships never end well. Situationships don’t produce fruitfulness but casualties and the biggest casualty could be you. I watched a video the other day of a woman, using a hammer to smash the windows out of her mans car while he, and wait for it…HER CHILDREN were in the car!!! The children were crying, after she had finished breaking every single window and light on the Range Rover (yes it was a Range Rover!), she then proceeded to hit HIM with the hammer. Only after all this did she decide to take her OWN children out of the car! You could see blood on the child’s arm from where the glass had cut her. I shook my head in disbelief as I watched thinking what could this guy have done to warrant that kind of reaction? Did he get himself into a situationship? It was obvious their relationship was long established through the fact that children were involved. This was a latino couple by the way (incase anyone was wondering LOL). The fact of the matter is, you need to look at the bigger picture and not live for short term pleasures and “temporary forevers” (LOL that rhymes). Don’t settle for 3rd party ladies, because you will always be the one left out in the cold…even if he does leave the other woman for you, is that something that you want on your conscience? When things go sour between the two of you, will he do the same thing to you?
What scenario’s would you class as a situationship family? Let me know below.
Insightful write up Keri Beri. We must be careful not to sacrifice the ultimate for the immediate.
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Love that concise answer sugar girl, that sums up exactly what I’m saying x
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This reminds me of #hurtbae who told his girlfriend to leave the room when she caught him in bed with another woman (not to mention all the hype about side dudes and side chics these days).
If a person openly cheats why would you openly and whole heartedly stay? #knowyourworth
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Hurtbae??? Never heard about this, gonna have to check this one out lol. But yes its not about sticking around in that type of situation
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Nice article and meaningful message….just one thing cheating is not a patent of men…women are not far behind. The only gap is gender based risk appetite while bringing a third person in life.
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Women are also changing way they approach cheating and they too expose their family to great danger, infact a higher danger compared to men.
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Sistahs! Remember what a man will do to someone else is more than likely what he will go on to eventually do to you…
So you upstage another woman to get yourself into a “Situationship”, but really you are kidding yourself and downplaying the scenario you have now ended up in.
I say “Don’t do it!, the grass is never greener in the another woman’s shoes”…
Wait until you find someone who wants and respect you in that way you should be. Also raise the bar, so the man has to put in that extra effort to acquire you in his life as a “Relationship & not a Situationship!”.
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Yes Lady Divine, love that response!
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Situationships are so weird. It’s like one day you look at and you’re like, “how did I get here?”. Good post!
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lol thx for your comment. The reason why I wrote this is to help those including myself from getting into that downward spiral.
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