You find the one you love, DOING what you love. – Ralph Smart

Has anyone ever said to you, “Find someone who loves you a little more than you love them? or give the guy that you’re not attracted to a chance because he will treat you like a queen. I totally get where these notions are coming from, it comes from a place of disappointment and hopelessness in a man that is the total package. My mind set has always been why settle? At best I can only hope for a reflection of who I am, so if I have a good job, a good heart, and I’m attractive why can I not expect to find the same? If I enjoy seeking out spiritual matters, having intellectual debates, and having fun, why should I settle for anything less? People who settle in relationships don’t know what they want. Before you can know what you want, you need to know yourself (see post Know Thyself here). Having numerous relationships may seem tiring but in reality, relationships are a training ground for you to learn about yourself. The best relationships are ones in which you can see yourself clearly. Relationships are mirrors that should bring out the best in you, but if it does bring out the worst you should either strive to change it or acknowledge your shadow side and bring yourself into balance. The latter is the best option.

Everyone has a shadow side, the problem is we either try to hide it or we fully operate in the shadow side. If you are fully operating in your shadow side you are out of balance. I would say its best to avoid people who’s shadow side is in full swing. You may have had a string of failed relationships but it wasn’t a waste of time. If you keep meeting the same type of people its no coincidence, figure out what the pattern is and change it. Change starts within ones self. The quote above says “You find the one you love doing what you love”. I love to have fun and dance, I was doing exactly that when I met the one I love. It’s your energy that people are attracted to if you have a happy, vibrant energy people will flock to you. There are energy vampires out there too so be aware of this. I guess what I’m trying to say is be authentic, take off the mask, because real people are more attracted to authenticity than anything else. Don’t settle for anything less than what you want and thats not just in relationships but in life. I love astrology and I seem to be meeting more and more people that do these days. The zodiac is made up of four essential elements Earth, Fire, Water and Air. Earth signs (Capricorn, Taurus and Virgo) are the builders, they are stable and who doesn’t like stability? Fire signs (Sagittarius, Leo and Aries) are the Initiators, we (I’m a fire sign) go boldly where no one dares to tread and who doesn’t like bravery? Air signs (Gemini, Libra and Aquarius) are the communicators, they keep everyone connected and who doesn’t like an icebreaker? Water signs (Scorpio, Cancer and Pisces) are the intuitive ones, they see beyond the surface and who doesn’t like the gift of foresight? I say this to say that astrology is one of the greatest tools of getting to know yourself and others. If you take the time to understand yourself you can adjust to others. An ancient Egyptian proverb says “All is within yourself. Know your most inward self and look for what corresponds with it in nature”. 

In conclusion I strongly believe in balance and reciprocity, look for someone that is your equal/complementary opposite.